Style Your Body Shape

I’ve always had this dream about clothes - specifically a wardrobe full of beautiful, sexy clothes that fit wonderfully and are perfectly me. Possibly this is not much of a surprise since you’re reading this on my blog about style.

That said I have to say I’m not much of a fan of fashion. I read a lot of blogs and look at a lot of clothing websites and frankly it just makes me tired. What I want is to have a wardrobe of classic items that work together so that I’m covered for all occasions. I like to shop, but I’m very budget conscious so I prefer to prioritize my money. What I really want is to have some looks all worked out and then buy the items I need to achieve those looks, always working with my own body shape of course.

Such is the province of wardrobe planning, and it’s twin sister the look book. Since this is something that I really want to do for my own personal wardrobe I may as well write about the process as I go through it.

Stick around and find out how to plan your wardrobe.

LISA

I haven’t posted for a while because I’ve been in two minds as to whether to continue this blog or not.

Recently I’ve been reading lots of different stuff about body image. I struggle constantly with my own body image, and it tends to permeate every part of my life. When I step out of my comfort zone, and try something new and different, I feel uncomfortable, which, hello, the whole point. The problem is that when I’m uncomfortable I’m afraid and when I’m afraid my mind conjures thoughts and memories to try and get me to move away from what makes me uncomfortable. And those thoughts are always about my weight; the many diets I’ve tried and failed, how ugly I feel, how unacceptable and unlovable I think that makes me.

And then I find images that reinforce how ugly I am. I’m an overweight person and in this particular society that’s portrayed as a very bad thing and there are an infinite number of images and comments that reinforce that opinion.

Rethinking My Aim

I started this blog when I began learning how to dress to flatter my shape and I couldn’t believe how much difference it made to the way I felt about myself. I started because I was sick of waiting for nice clothes but it turns out to be one of the steps to overcoming eating disorders - go figure. Suddenly I was feeling sexy and beautiful for the first time in a very long time. Having finally found something I was passionate about I started this blog to share it with the world, hampered somewhat by the process of learning how to blog along the way. Unfortunately in researching this blog I’m soaking in thousands of images every day that reinforce premise only the thin are beautiful, only the thin deserve nice clothes and only the thin are acceptable. The gains toward self acceptance are constantly being undermined by my own reading.

One of the basic ideas of working with your body shape is to create the illusion of an hourglass - that figure being the ‘ideal’ feminine shape. As I learn more about overcoming body image issues I realize I’m selling the same fantasy; lose the excess weight and suddenly be happy and whole. Or, as is the focus of this blog, fake it. I don’t believe that though; being thin is not the root of all happiness. And quite frankly I’m starting to see beauty in shapes other than an hourglass.

Examining My Own Beliefs

But I still keep looking in the mirror and examining my ‘bits’ critically. I look at my beautiful daughter and ignore how wonderful and amazing she is in favor of focusing on her size as if that is the only thing that’s important. I have this ingrained habit of contrasting my body with other women’s bodies, and it always includes a critique of the other women, even if it is my 15 year old daughter. I feel so judgemental and I’m incredibly ashamed of that.

The really confusing thing is that I look in the mirror and I like what I see - well maybe not my thighs - but I’m pretty ok with me and the way I look. Right up until I actually leave the house. Or try something and fail. Then I failed because I’m fat. I’m single because I’m fat. What an excuse - it’s all powerful. The Wall Street crisis has hit because Lisa is fat.

Really it’s just a stick that I use to beat myself with. Because I’ve believed the message that I can change my body shape with diet and exercise and I believed all the other messages that said if I was fat I was ugly and it was my duty to rectify the situation. It’s no wonder I’ve spent so much time confused. On one hand I like the way I look, and on the other I believe the messages that it’s wrong to look this way.

Where Do I Go From Here

I don’t really know where I’m going from here. I know I have more to say, particularly on the twin issues of self esteem and body acceptance, although this is possibly not the right arena. I know I don’t want to keep looking at endless pictures of thin, toned young women in clothes I can never wear.

So … I’ll be making a few changes over the next few weeks. I look forward to finding out what they might be. If you have any suggestions they will be greatly appreciated.

LISA

I saw this gorgeous dress on one of the style blogs I subscribe to. Truly this is a beautiful dress but since the post was entitled “must buy for autumn” or words to that effect I just had to laugh because this dress is actually not going to flatter a lot of shapes.

Avoid this dress, or another like it if:

• You have big breasts - the turtle-neck will smother your boobs and make them look bigger.
• If you’re bigger on top - the same with big breasts. You need the open cleavage to de-emphasize.
• If you have a little extra in the middle - again it’s just going to emphasize everything.
• If you’re bigger on the bottom - this style is going to cling everywhere and emphasize the difference. Clingy on top is ok, but opt for a flared skirt to offset.
• If you’re a rectangular or brick shape - this dress highlights the waist and if there’s no waist then that is highlighted as well.
• If you’re extra curvy - this is going to show every single curve and roll and imperfection. It’ also going to emphasize what’s there so unless you’re very comfortable with your curve this is one to miss. If you’re curves are kick ass then break out the spanex and go for it.
• If you’re not curvy - you need more structure in your clothes. Something that clings like this is going to highlight that there’s not much to cling too.

Try this dress, or another like it if:

• You’re an hourglass and you don’t have any of the issues mentioned above. It will look sensational.

Despite that this dress is actually sold out.

There is no such thing as a must-have in clothes. We just come in far to many different shapes. Don’t get sucked in to buying something just because its what the shops are selling this season. Sometimes its better to go without than jump on a trend.

Good shopping,

LISA

Recently the VMA’s were held and in true completely superficial fashion (pun intended) I’ve been checking out what all the stars wore and, just as interesting, what people have to say about that. Everyone has a different viewpoint. One thing all the commentators seem to agree on is that highlight your tits, or highlight your ass but don’t do both.

The basic rule for evening dresses is skin vs shape.

Show some skin or show your shape, but not both. Equally when you go for skin choose your boobs or your legs but not both. Brooke Hogan demonstrates this clearly by breaking all the rules. The issue is that the dress is too low cut and it’s also really short. Having a low cut dress is not an issue and then neither is having a very short dress, but both together is just too much as the focus is very much taken off the clothes. This brief, figure hugging outfit makes it look like she only just bothered to throw something on. Being stylish is about being sexy as all get out but in a way that hints rather than punches you in the face.

Ciara by comparison received many oohs and aahs for this gorgeous outfit. She’s showcasing her legs and the top by comparison is almost demure. The whole look is set off by some very expensive accessories and great attitude. She looks classy and stylish and very much the successful rock diva.

Ciara’s dress wouldn’t work for Brooke Hogan because Brooke is stacked and a boat neckline will just make her look like she swallowed a couple of melons. Plus, Brooke would look silly trying to pull off elegance - it’s not her style at all. Britney Spears shows us how it’s done.

Britney has managed to keep her laid-back, cool, California look and make it elegant at the same time. The length of the skirt is short enough to show off her legs but still be demure (on Britney anyway) and the off the shoulder look gives us a glimpse of her top whilst keeping her pretty much zipped up. The whole outfit is made super sexy by the way it clings to her curves.

Where would I wear a sequined dress?

Sequins are strictly evening wear so it pretty much limits it to cocktails, black tie and red carpet events. A sequined skirt or top is great for nightclubbing paired with jeans or a plain top, but a dress is going too far.

Be aware of the people you will be with before choosing a sparkly gown. For instance not all black tie events are created equal. A sequined dress will not be the best option for a business black tie event, when understated is a better option, so drag out your little black dress and glam it up. If it’s a social black tie event then you’re good to go.

A floor length frock, whether it’s sequined or not, is only for black tie and red carpet events and should not be worn for cocktails.

A final note

Every women should have one evening wear outfit. No matter what your lifestyle at some stage you’re going to need to dress up and go out. To avoid doing the last minute shop and buying something you will never wear again plan the purchase and have it sitting in your closet.

It’s also a good idea to wear it, around the house at least, to get more comfortable. There’s nothing worse than buying something for a big celebration and spending the whole time feeling like you stand out like a sore thumb because the outfit is not something you would ever wear.

Good shopping,

LISA

The other day I read an article about a piece published in the Observer, a British paper. They’d taken a couple of size 16 women, models, and done a photo shoot. The idea being that size 16 is the average size of British women. They were shocked by the results feeling that the women were too overtly feminine. “Almost fetishistic” was the phrase they used, suggesting the only people that could find these women attractive are in some way perverted.

I was gob-smacked when I read that. Not because someone thinks fat women are unattractive, hello, where’s the surprise in that; but because I believed it! My whole life I’ve lived by a premise that covering up is my god given duty because I’m fat. I always thought that was to hide my shame but I see now it’s so that other people don’t feel embarrassed. And not embarrassed on my behalf; it actually makes more sense that they feel confronted by my ‘overtly feminine’ curves. As if it’s a crime to be curvy.

The worse thing is that I want to change. All my life I’ve believed all those messages telling me to change, to be thinner, that I’m not good enough the way I am. And yet secretly I love my curves. I think they’re totally kick ass. It’s no wonder I spend so much time confused about my body.

So I’ve decided to declare myself as a ‘pervert’ because I think these woman look incredibly sexy and beautiful. Of course this means that I’m going to have to let go of some of my own preconceptions about myself and that actually sounds like a really good idea.

So, are you a pervert?

LISA

The more I learn about body shape the more resistant I am to actually defining a shape. One of the things that I, personally, have gained from writing this website is a greater measure of understanding of my own body and the shape that it is. How that translates into choosing clothing is still somewhat confusing and something I’m working my way through, actually as I write this website.

I do know that I don’t like the four categories I started off with. The issues with the use of the term pear basically highlighted the need for more appropriate classification. I want to further illustrate this point by examining the 12 shapes that Trinny & Susannah have identified - hourglass, cello, vase, bell, skittle, goblet, pear, lollipop, cornet, apple, column and brick.

The four categories I started with are hourglass, triangle, pear and rectangle. What shape you fall into is simple enough to define based on some simple measurements. These categories can be broken down even further into the types that Trinny & Susannah have identified.

HOURGLASS = PROPORTIONATE

1. HOURGLASS - big tits, small waist, short waist, big hips, generous thighs

What really defines an hourglass is her tiny waist.

2. CELLO - big boobs, short waist, big hips, big bottom, big thighs, slim lower legs

A cello is an hourglass with a little extra around the middle which pretty much removes the tiny waist.

3. VASE - big tits, gently curving longer waist, hips equal tits, slim thighs and legs

A vase is sort of stretched out hourglass. A vase is very much defined by her height.

PEAR SHAPE = BIGGER ON BOTTOM

4. BELL - small shoulders, small tits, small waist, big thighs, big bottom

A bell’s breasts and waist are fairly similar size with all the extra on the bottom.

5. SKITTLE - average tits, slim waist, ok tummy, big thighs, chunky calves

A skittle has curvaceous thighs and bottom but is smaller on top.

6. PEAR - small tits, long waist, flat tummy, saddlebags, heavy legs

A pear is characterized by extra weight on the outer thighs.

TRIANGLE - BIGGER ON TOP

7. LOLLIPOP - big tits, slight waist, slim hips, long legs

The majority of celebrities fall into this category.

8. CORNET - broad shoulders, small boobs, no waist, slim hips, long slim legs

Take away the big breasts and the shape becomes almost boyish.

9. GOBLET - broad shoulders, big boobs, no waist, narrow hips, long legs

And sometimes you’re just plain bigger on top.

RECTANGLE = EXTRA IN THE MIDDLE

10. APPLE - average tits, tummy bigger than tips, quiet flat bottom, OK legs

For this shape your stomach dictates how your dress, being the widest part.

11. COLUMN - shoulder width the same as hips, slight waist, longer legs

A column is tall and has no waist rather than extra - like an, um, column.

12. BRICK - Broad shoulders, no waist, average tummy, flat bum, chunky thighs, chunky calves

A shorter and wider version of the column, again with no waist.

And there you have the 12 shapes of Trinny & Susannah. I think these definitions are more useful that the simple four simply because it begins to really breakdown the categories in each group.

So what category are you? I am a cello.

LISA

One of the things I really want to achieve with this site is a resource where you can find good information, for free, on how to dress for your shape, so that other people like me, who didn’t know an empire line from a kitten heel, can, from scratch, develop their own style. Some people don’t want to know how to do it though, they just want to reap the benefits. To be told these are the things that will fit you. Choose what you want. If that describes you then check out myShape.com.

myShape.com is a personal shopping website. They have defined seven body shapes which they’ve labeled M, Y, S, H, A, P, E, which is kind of creepy, but probably quite functional. Remember shapes are arbitrary and only there to categorize and it doesn’t matter what shape or size you may or may not be if the result is looking and feeling fabulous.

When you join up there is an extensive questionnaire to go through including lots and lots of measurements including some that I would never have even thought of taking. The idea being that the more they know about you the better fitting the clothes they suggest will be. From the measurements you’re categorized into one of the seven body shapes.

My shape is M. There is only a small amount of information about how they categorize body shapes and what will and will not suit that particular shape. It’s not a teaching site - it’s a shopping site. There are two options; shop your personal shop which has only clothing in a size and style that will definitely fit you or shop the entire collection.

I was pleasantly surprised by the stuff in my collection. The majority of the items would suit someone my shape with only a couple of real misses (like a turtleneck jumper - a woman with breasts like mine just can’t carry off a turtleneck) and there were definitely things there I wanted to buy. Unfortunately they only ship to the US and Canada so I was out of luck. I still log in now and then to see if there’s anything I like enough to bother tracking down and to keep an eye on what’s out there.

myShape.com is a good option to style your body shape, but keep coming back to my site. I’ll miss you!

Good shopping,

LISA

Susana Monaco skirt - $47.40 from JBandme.com

I’ve had quite a few queries about pencil skirts and pear shapes so wanted to address that. I love this awesome pencil skirt and it’s definitely something that I might wear and I’m a pear shape. But then not all pear shapes are created equal. Technically I am a pear shape in that I’m bigger on the bottom BUT the majority of weight is around my hips and if I gain weight it goes to my inner thighs and hips. For me a pencil skirt is a good way to disguise my thighs but make use of the curves of my hips and bottom.

If you are a true pear shape in that your widest part is around the outside of your thighs a pencil skirt will not work for you. A pencil skirt highlights the curves of the thigh and in the case of the true pear it’s a question of getting your thighs back into proportion with the rest of your slender frame. A minimizing strategy is a far better option.

So … who does suit a pencil skirt? If you have a big bootie - think J Lo or Kim Kardashian - then the pencil skirt is ideal for you. Anyone with an hourglass frame it will play up your figure. If you’re extra curvy definitely try a pencil skirt, or the close cousins the straight or fluted skirt, to play up those curves. If you’re slender a pencil skirt will work to make the most of the curves you have.

AVOID - if you’re pear shaped. Also avoid if you have extra in the middle as you need to offset that extra on the lower half and a pencil skirt won’t help. The same applies if you’re bigger on top. You both need to add volume to your lower half and this isn’t the best option.

Good shopping,

LISA

This is a list of things that will make you look bigger. I’ve tried to concentrate of things that we unintentionally wear not realizing the effect they will have, so I haven’t mentioned the obvious things like a downy parka or a thick knit sweater - because, well, duh! Weed these things that will make you look fat out of your closet.

1. Elastisized Waistbands The problem with elastisized waistbands, at least for everyone but those with boyish figures, is not only the way the material puffs out instantly creating more volume where most of us just don’t need it but also the instability of the garment. If you have any sort of curves the waistband will move either up or down as you go about your day. The band is going to find the slimmest place to sit and again, unless you have the boyish figure it’s going to be a lot higher than you want. Basically it just doesn’t fit properly. A tighter band that does sit where you want it doesn’t work well either. Unless you’re toned all the way around the midsection you’re going to get the ’squished bread’ look, which is very unflattering. Keep the elastisized waistbands on your gym clothes.

2. Pleats Pleats that fall from the waistband of your pants and skirts create volume. Their mission in life is to create a better fit, to follow the curves of the body more comfortably and stylishly. They highlight. Since they sit on your hips and tummy they will highlight your hips and tummy. It’s like wearing glad wrap, so unless your hips and tummy are so fabulous they deserve to be highlighted give pleats a miss.

TIP: A paneled and pleated skirt, like the one pictured, or one with inverted pleats that start below the stomach are great options for those wanting to conceal their stomach.

3. Horizontal Stripes Horizontal stripes trick the eye into thinking ‘wider’. The smaller and closer together the stripes the more pronounced the effect. A wider stripe still has the same effect, though not so pronounced. This is actually a shame because horizontal stripes are a classic - think Audrey Hepburn. Certainly wear them, BUT, keep them in proportion. If you’re a small person go for a small stripe. If you’re a large person go for a larger stripe. If you’re big busted or plus size, skip it altogether.

TIP: Horizontal stripes are an excellent way for pear-shaped people to add volume to their upper body and offset wider hips.

4. Metallic and Shiny Clothes Shiny or reflective clothes … um, well, they reflect. The effect is to make whatever they’re covering look bigger. So when you reach for those satin pants or that gold jacket be aware of what the overall effect is going to be. Actually this is a great way to get proportion back into your shape. If you’re bigger on top opt for the satin skirt matched with more subdued top or a shiny camisole matched with black pants if you’re bigger on the bottom. 5. A Small Handbag If you’re a big person and you go with a small handbag it’s not the handbag that’s going to stand out. Comparisons will be made and since your body is approximately 30 times larger than the handbag the size of your body will be emphasized, even if you’re not particularly big in the first place. Your bag should mirror your size. If you’re smaller and wear a bigger bag - same comparison, different conclusion - you will seem small.

TIP: For best effect your handbag should be the opposite of your shape. If you’re a curvy person go with a more structured handbag like the one pictures. If you’re angular go with an unstructured tote.

6. Zips, pockets, ruffles, feathers, fur Anything extra added onto clothes is going to draw the eye and make the piece of body it’s covering look bigger. So if you have big boobs then no ruffles or flounces or anything extra other than what you already have. The same if you got lots of booty - keep things calm and minimal there. Added extras are best kept as the province of the slender or used to remedy proportion issues, and then only very sparingly. Anyone who is plus sized should avoid like the plague. Color and texture are better options.

Baggy Clothes I just wanted to finish with a word about baggy clothes. You can instantly make yourself look slimmer by wearing fitting clothes. If you’re big and you wear baggy clothes rather than conceal it simply highlights how big you are. If you’re small it will highlight how small you are. Wearing fitted clothes will make you look slimmer but you will also feel more confident. Trust me, it works.

Good shopping,

LISA

One of the things that I’ve found to be really important is to keep an eye on what other people are wearing and when I see something that I like I steal it. One of my favorite casual outfits to wear was inspired by a picture I once saw of Uma Thurman. Not that I look like Uma Thurman in any way shape or form; in fact it’s pretty safe to say I’m the anti-Uma. The point is take inspiration from every where and then adapt.

The is a casual but classy look that America Ferrera seems to be fond of, probably because it’s simple but elegant.

Why It Works?

America is an hourglass shape and is curvy, well, curvier than most actresses. She’s also short. Overall her goal will be to work with her curves without over emphasizing them and create the illusion of length in her legs. And, like all curvy women, and petite women for that matter, she needs to keep it simple.

SHOES

A curvy lady needs a curvy shoe; in this case the peep-toe is perfect to complement America’s body shape. Note that there are no straps around her ankle or over her foot which would breakup the lengthening line of the shoe.

Petite ladies need to be careful with heels. Certainly opt or a heel, even select flats with a little lift to help extend the length of your leg but keep a heel small and in proportion with your stature or you can look off-balance.

Steve Madden Tetra Pump $38.47 from Endless.com.

PANTS

To give the illusion of being taller it’s important to elongate the leg. This has been achieved here with use of a belt sitting higher than America’s natural waist. Combined with the skinny leg jeans it makes her legs look longer than they really are and America tall and lean.

The dark wash of the jeans does a good job of camouflaging that America’s thighs are curvy. Notice how the dark blue does a better job than the black. I wouldn’t recommend straight leg jeans for anyone with larger thighs; rather opt for a wide leg but go with the darker wash.

Silver Sienna Straight Leg Jeans $75-00 from Jbandme.com.

Belt

It’s usually not a good idea for petite women to wear a belt as it breaks up the line of the body. In this case it works because it actually helps elongate.

A thin belt is better for curvy women although be careful if you’re extra curvy as it can give the impression of a loaf of bread squished in the middle.

Matching the belt to the shoes gives a polished look.

Merona Skinny Belt $19.99 from Amazon.com.

Top

This V neck top draws our eyes up to America’s gorgeous face and also gives the illusion of slenderness by dissecting the body.

The top is voluminous which disguises any lumps and bumps and the belt cinches in the waist giving an hourglass look.

Notice where the hem of the shirt hits America’s waist. She looks slimmer on the left and this is a combination of the wash on the pants and the place the top finishes. The eye is drawn where the fabric ends and on the left that is slightly lower and flows more smoothly into the pants. The way the hem curves also complements her shape and gives the illusion of slenderness. But beware; the outfit on the right probably looks better from the back as it will showcase the curve of her bottom which will be disguised by the shirt on the left. It’s all a matter of which part you want to show and which you want to conceal.

Where the sleeves finish is also helps each outfit. On the left the eyes are drawn again to the hem of her shirt which helps the eye flow downwards and contributes to the slimmer image. On the right the sleeves finish at her waist again emphasizing that hourglass look.

Vince Short Sleeve Tunic $93.00 from Labelspree.com

Who will this work for?

This is a style that will work for, obviously, anyone petite and curvy. It will work for the taller and curvy as well but watch the placement of the belt as you could end up looking freakishly long legged.

If you’re very curvy then try matching the belt to the shirt - it will still define your waist but be more slimming as well.

It will work for someone with a little extra in the middle as the voluminous shirt can hide a multiple of sins, however opt for a bootleg or slightly flared jeans instead.

If you’re a rectangle go for a wider belt.

AVOID if you have big breasts or you’re pear shaped. There are better options.

Good shopping

LISA